Friday, November 4, 2011

My Weight Watchers Journey

So as most of you may already know.. I am a member of Weight Watchers. I can honestly say that it has changed my life! I started my journey February 23rd and have since lost 35 lbs! It has been fairly easy but there has also been many struggles.

I started out feeling VERY unhappy with myself. I was at the heaviest I had ever been.. I hated mirrors and anything that reflected my image. All I saw was this fat person who was hurting inside. I will open up about my past a bit. I ended a 4.5 year relationship in late November... looking back now it was the best move I ever made of my life. There was a lot of abuse in that relationship.. mostly emotional. He hurt me very badly and I never thought I would be okay. I never heard positive compliments... it was always negative. I heard SO many times that my opinion didn't matter and he often asked me if I ever thought before I spoke. He'd tell me that he didnt find me attractive or that he didnt know if he loved me anymore. Telling me that he'd brush his teeth everyday if I would go to the gym everyday. Telling me I shouldn't wear certain kinds of underwear because it made my ass look awful. Telling me he'd only give me a ring if I was a size 6. Telling me my smile was "fucked" and that he was the beauty of our relationship and I was the beast. He even looked for other women while we were still dating and didn't even give me an option to decide whether or not I wanted to be with him.

He even told me that he didn't want to get physical with me anymore because having sex with me reminded him of having sex with his mother.. his blond haired, blue eyed, short and chubby mother. I have brown eyes & hair.. am almost 5'9 and am chubby.. made alot of sense.

Here is an excerpt from my other blog to truly describe how I felt after getting out of that mess:

"He ruined me.. he ruined who I was.. I was a confident, happy person who never stopped smiling..and now .. I am the girl who hates her self.. who hates mirrors and is always disguising my emotions because I hurt so bad. Sure, I am always smiling but that's what I have to do to not have to explain why I'm so sad. There are few things that make me happy anymore.. FEW..

I just don't know what to do anymore.. I guess time heals everything.. I just need to move on and focus on the present:).. and future."

This is exactly what I did.. I focused on my friends, my family, my new life... I focused on my own happiness for the first time in so long. It really changed me as a person. Two months later I decided to join weight watchers because I knew if I didn't get help I would be stuck forever.

I can honestly say that I have never been happier in my ENTIRE life. I have a best friend who is always there for me and boosting me up. I can talk to her about ANYTHING and she is always giving me inspiration to continue on my weight loss journey. I have a close relationship with my family and they make me feel great. Also, I am in a relationship with someone who I had been friends with for quite some time before we started dating. He treats me better than any man ever has and I am truly happy.

Getting back to the weight watchers portion of this post.. It really works. The plan is sooo easy to follow! I can literally eat ANYTHING.. the only restrictions I have are portion sizes. If I want to eat that piece of cake.. I need to plan the rest of my day around it.. PLAN PLAN PLAN!! That is the BIG thing for me. If you don't plan ahead you're just planning to fail!

There are also a few good health guidelines I need to follow which lay out how much fruits/veggies, healthy fats, milk, protein and activity I should be getting in a day. It also advices me to fill up on power foods which are nutritious and satisfying foods that work to help me lose weight:) I have recommended this to so many people and they also succeeded (if they stuck to the plan). My mom lost 20 lbs so quickly and whooped my arse!

The weight loss has been slow lately but I know I can get back in gear and work as hard as I can to get the lbs to drop! I also have to realize that I've lost more than 30 lbs and my body needs to adjust! The lbs may not be dropping on the scale but it has been showing in my measurements and so many people are still noticing that I'm losing :).

It's such a fun feeling! Anyways.. I'm writing this on my lunch break and now I need to get back to work! Hope you all have a great friday!



  1. Theres always a beginning! But when it comes to health...never an end!

  2. so happy and proud of and for you. keep up the great work and remember how beautiful you truely are inside and out. and, new boy? oh do tell on the other blog, fb, somewhere!! love and hugs! LMCB