Learning to Love YOU

Hating on yourself is self destructive. When you only point out your flaws.. that is the only thing you will ever see. How can you be happy if you constantly say "I'm not good enough", "I'm too fat", "I hate myself", "I wish I was prettier", "I will always be single" or "LIFE SUCKS". etc, etc, etc.

If you do this you need to change your attitude. Let me tell you.. if you believe those things..  your life WILL suck and the only thing that is making your life suck is YOURSELF.

Learning to love yourself is not an easy task when you are surrounded by nothing but negativity and darkness. I know because I've been there. I am a success story. I was depressed, unhappy.. I cried almost every single day but everyone who knew me thought I was fine because I smiled all the time. They never understood what was going on underneath my "happy exterior". Here is an quote from my past personal blog (which I deleted as it was only negative and held horrible, horrible memories):

and now .. I am the girl who hates her self.. who hates mirrors and is always disguising my emotions because I hurt so bad. Sure, I am always smiling but that's what I have to do to not have to explain why I'm so sad. There are few things that make me happy anymore.. FEW..


Do you think I am that person today? HELL NO! I LOVE myself. I think I am BEAUTIFUL, smart.. sexy even! I smile non stop because I am radiating happiness inside and out.. I want to share my smile and have people see me at my best. I really am a success story. (AND I love mirrors :)) To think I thought those things just over a year ago.. to think I was in a place where I didn't want to move forward.. where I didn't think I'd be okay.. where I didn't think I'd find happiness ever again.

I believe in the power of thought.. most people who know me well already know this. I really do believe that if you focus on the positives in your life and focus on the things that matter instead of the shitty, negative things... Good things will come. Happiness will follow. I believe that YOU choose your own destiny. If your life sucks.. you are the only one who will be able to change that. If you are in a bad spot and you want things to be different.. you have to change that. Sometimes it might take a bit of time but it will happen!

How can you start? Learn to LOVE YOURSELF!

Loving yourself is key to being happy. Loving yourself does not make you conceited or an asshole. It is having self-respect .. unconditional self acceptance. When someone puts you down it doesn't mean that you shouldn't love yourself.. it means they need help.. that they have no personal self respect. When someone can go as low as to put another individual down do you think they are happy inside? Nope. Don't sit around waiting for approval from others because the most important thing in life is that you accept yourself.  Loving yourself is a beautiful thing!

If you don't love yourself.. why would anybody else?

Everyone is allowed to have a bad day.. every woman is allowed to have PMS and cry because she feels like shit.(its pretty natural right?) But when this happens every single day you really need to re-evaluate the way you are living your life and the way you see yourself.

What can you do to learn to appreciate and love yourself more?

• Look at yourself in the mirrow and repeat "You are beautiful.. you are fabulous.. you are loved." Do this every time you look in the mirror and repeat that ten times! (You can change the words but say something positive!)
• Work on being the best YOU
• Post notes around your room/work space/car with positive affirmations or positive quotes. Surrounding yourself with these things creates a positive environment. 
• Take care of yourself-- mind, body, and soul.
• Do random good deeds for others. When you do good things for others it really makes you feel good about yourself ( Plus I truly believe that karma exists!)
• DO NOT rely on other people to make you happy. 
• Let go of the past and the negative. Cherish what you have learned from those events but focus on the present and the positive.
• Create goals and work hard to achieve them. No matter how many times you do not succeed you are only a failure if you give up. 
• Don't let your past define who you currently are or who you intend to be.
• Be yourself and don't care what others think. Laugh, sing, dance.. just do you!
• Treat yourself the way you would treat your best friend
• DON'T compare yourself to others. Being unique is fun.
• Misery loves company. Surround yourself with loving and positive people.
• Don't change yourself based on what other people think. Do this for YOU.
• Look at yourself through the eyes of those that love you. They know who you are and they CHOOSE to love you. 

I read this in my book (B is for Beauty) : " It's so funny: when you feel strong and happy, everybody wants to hang out with you, but when you allow yourself to feel miserable and lonely nobody will touch you with a ten foot pole"

Ain't that the truth?

Anyways I must take off.

Have a fantastic Thursday! Weekend is ALMOST here :)

xo

Steph